Verse of the Day:
“But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not be faint”
Quote of the Day:
“She has fire in her soul & grace in her heart”
~Unknown – My quote for the year.
Excerpt of the Day:
“The sad thing is, these are all moms that I’d love to be friends with in real life. I wish that rude, nosy folks hadn’t ruined the art of conversation for everyone, because there are people like me who genuinely seek connection with parents of all stripes. I’ve never been one for wasting time on small talk—I want to get to know the real person I’m speaking with—but I feel like chit chat is all that’s available anymore. Living in a culture where people are quick to get offended, I worry that being on the defensive all the time is preventing us from initiating true friendships and sharing our unique stories.”
~ 10 Moms I can No Longer Speak To on ScaryMommy
~A friend of a friend on facebook added this:
“I’m not even a mom yet and I can relate. Not being a mom makes it even worse bc ‘I just don’t understand’ or ‘I cant relate to them so they don’t turn to me.’ When I asked a friend awhile back via text “hey what are you doing tonight?” ..and their response a was, “Raising a child.. What are you doing?” …I realized at that moment that I was going to lose those types of mommy friends and that broke my heart. I’m SO appreciate my friends who allow us to still be around them and their kids and allow us to play and help take care of their kids and ask these types of questions with a willing heart to share. I love when our hangout nights consist of Murder Mystery with the adults followed by a pillow fight and Xbox games with the kids. Please know that just bc we don’t have kids, doesn’t mean we don’t want to be around you or think your kids are nuisance. I ADORE children (and sometimes might prefer hanging out with them over adults in all honesty.) haha. And know that we ask bc we care or we want to LEARN from you. But I feel the same as her, I just don’t ask.”
My 2 Cents:
I’m pretty dang lucky that the majority of my friends (moms & dads) that have kids are amazing, and are the exception to this article. Thanks so much for being who you are. I hope you know that I love you and and your kiddos with all my heart.
The thing is that this article is incredibly accurate for quite a number of people. I crave deep connected relationships (I think we all do, we’re just all pretty afraid) and when you can’t ask the real questions and speak to the places that are deep in our hearts, then how can we really have community/belonging/connection. This goes to more than just being a parent, it reaches to the other parts of life (marriage, career, passions, relationships, beliefs).
And though I fully acknowledge that being a parent is a huge part of your identity, it doesn’t solely define you, my friend, in my eyes. Sure it’s a part of you, and one I love watching thrive, and bloom. But I hope it doesn’t define you in your eyes either. You are all the wonderful things you were before you brought that awesome tiny human into this world, only you are better, wiser. And I haven’t forgotten that. I still see you. I still want to know you. So I will ask those questions. Because I love you.
Currently Listening to “Songs to Make Up To” by Ta-ku – Especially “Love Again” “Down for You” & “Sunrise/Beautiful”